What Might Have Been....

It's going to be a hard week. You see, this is the week that Zion would most likely be joining our little family. It's been a hard 8 months. Not a week goes by that I don't wonder about what might have been. Not a week that I don't think of how he/she would be developing in my womb. I wonder if Zion was a boy or girl. What would he/she look like? What was his/her personality like? How would he/she have added to our family? What is God's plan in all this? The boys talk about Zion often and it brings me comfort. We talk about seeing Zion in heaven some day. Some days, the pain feels unbearable. Even though Zion was a surprise, I wanted that precious baby so badly. But one thing I know, God is faithful. I trust His plan for me. My verse for the last few months has been "The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord!". Sometimes on the bad days, I think of Zion in heaven. I think of the wonderful company he/she already has there. I think of my sister's son, Brian, who died at birth. I think of my sister-in-law's first baby, who passed early in the first trimester. I think of my Mom and Aaron's Mom, both who have babies waiting for them in heaven and I can't help but smile. They must all be the best of friends, waiting in the arms of Jesus for their Daddy, Mommy, brothers and sisters to join them.

My sweet Zion: I am so thankful for the time that God blessed me with you. In my mind it was much too short but "I will praise the One who has chosen me to carry you". I will never forget you my little one. I can't wait to hold you in my arms and introduce you to your brothers. I will see you soon my precious Zion. Mommy loves you!

Thankful

Now these are little boy legs! See all those bumps, bruises and scrapes? It's funny how just the sight of these cute (very obviously boy) legs can make me so thankful. People often ask me if we want a girl. I have to be honest, I am content. Before having Josiah, I was terrified of having boys and really wanted all girls. But God knew what I needed, and I am so thankful that He gave me what I needed and not what I wanted. :) I'm not saying there is anything wrong with girls, I'm sure I would love them too...but there is something special about little boys in my heart. I love that my days are filled with legos, superheros, dirt, bugs, gross bodily functions (ok, maybe not really thankful about that part), wrestling,  transformers and nerf gun wars. I'm thankful that I hear on a daily basis "Mommy, you're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. I want to marry you!". I'm thankful for the mystery that little boys are to me. Sometimes I am watching them play with their superheros and suddenly am amazed at the way God made them so very different from girls. It's often obvious that they are made to be leaders and protectors.
I am grateful for the gifts God has given us...but the greatest gift is that I get to be their Mommy.

Food Allergies

Being a mom of a sweet boy with a very serious nut allergy is stressful. So many times I feel like people don't take me or his allergy seriously. I often hear (even from Americans) "so, he doesn't like to eat that food?". No, he could in fact DIE from eating this food. This morning I read this story and it broke my heart. I am grieving for this family. Even if your child doesn't have food allergies, please be thoughtful enough to ask before offering someone else's child food or drink. I have been to numerous kids birthday parties where nuts are served in some form. If there's going to be children there, why risk it? Just don't serve nuts!

Almost a year ago, we went to a restaurant (one that we go to often and know the people who work there) and the waiters took the boys to the counter while we were sitting at the table. I didn't think much of it. I sat there talking to our friends who were with us and then Casey came over with an Indian sweet in his hand. I started to panic when I saw he had taken a bite out of it. Before I could ask anyone what was in it, he said his tongue felt funny. Now I was really panicked. We gave him some benadryl and started praying. I'm sure the people in the restaurant thought we were crazy! Then the vomiting started....again and again and all that benadryl came up. I remember standing over him with the epi pen loaded and ready to use with tears streaming down my face. He was wheezing and terrified...and so was I. Was this how I was going to say goodbye to my little man? Over something so stupid and so preventable? All these things were running through my head as I held him in my arms, rocking him and telling him it was okay. Praise be to God that he slowly started getting better until he was back to normal.
When we knew Casey was okay, I looked over at Josiah and he was sobbing into his hands. I asked him what was wrong and he said "It's all my fault! I asked the man if it had milk in it but I didn't ask him if there were nuts before he gave it to Casey!". I was quick to explain to him that although he needs to look out for his little brother, it was in no way his fault.
My point is that it only takes ONE bite. ONE! This is a Mom of a food allergy kid begging you to be aware, begging you not to roll your eyes and sigh because your kids can't take nut food to school, begging you to understand that we didn't ask for this and we can't control it.

Favorite Things!

Time for a few of my favorite things!

1. Lacto Fermented Saurkraut - don't let the name scare you! Do you enjoy saurkraut? I LOVE it! My mom says that when I was little she would open a can of kraut, I would follow her around and beg her to let me eat it straight out of the can. Well, I made my own saurkraut (which is so much better for you) and it's amazing. The boys can't get enough of it! If you are new to the benefits of lacto fermented foods here is a good post to read - it's super good for you! Lacto fermenting is very easy, it just takes the patience to wait a few days until it's ready.

2. Salt and vinegar almonds - We are huge fans of salt and vinegar potato chips but obviously, those are not so good for you. Aaron had the bright idea to search for a salt and vinegar almond recipe and I'm so glad he did! These are delicious and addictive! But be warned, they make your house smell when boiling them.

3. Citrus Enzyme Cleaner - when you look at statistics online, it is scary to think of the ways that chemical cleaners can destroy the health of our families. Did you know that "Women who work at home have a 54% higher death rate from cancer than those who work away from home. The 15-year study concluded it was as a direct result of the much higher exposure rate to toxic chemicals in common household products!". I began looking into alternatives and found this recipe for Citrus enzyme cleaner. I've been using it for about a year and love it. I use it on everything...the bathrooms, mirrors, glass, counters...everything! I can't recommend it enough!

That's How We Do It At The Goccia Academy

Friday we decided to take home-school outside...to the park!

We started off having a little play time...P.E. - check.

Josiah - Monkey bar master!

A little more P.E. time with Papa - nerf gun wars!

Then we found this adorable little kitten and she became our play buddy for the rest of the day. Zoology - check.

We all took turns holding and playing with her. Sharing - check!

Workin' up a sweat and drinking water! Nutrition - check!

We found some different kinds of leaves and glued them on paper. Science - check!

Josie's turn!

It was so hard to leave this little girl that we grew so fond of in just a few short hours. We're hoping she will be there when we go back.

4.5 hours at the park + 10 minute car ride home = this.

and this! 

We had such a great day! Can't wait to do it again.

A Day With Friends

One of the things I really love about our job is investing in people and building relationships with them. There is one family that I especially love spending time with. We are serving the same One but they have paid a great price...they are refugees from Pakistan. They can never return home. There are times when I feel homesick, but at least I know that I could pick up and move back tomorrow...not so for them. So even though we like to think that we go to encourage them, we always leave encouraged ourselves!

To get to their house, we take a one hour train ride. We could drive our car but fighting the traffic here can wear on you, so we usually take the easier and cheaper option of the train. The boys have fun using their cameras to take pictures of people and the landscape as we wait on the train.

Josiah and Casey enjoying our train ride.

Josiah did not have time for his quiet time at home so he did it on the train. Here he's drawing a picture about what he learned.

Mommy and Casey

One of the pictures Josiah took at the train station.

Casey took this one of a small restaurant outside the train station.

I really try to limit our boys TV time, so they always love going to a friends house where they can watch more than I would normally allow!

Josiah and Bitu usually spend half their time wrestling.

Casey loves Abri!

The boys love spending time with these two special friends.

Some of the men...doing men stuff, I guess.

Playing "school".

Abri (the oldest) is the teacher!

Casey and Bitu...two cuties!

We usually spend most of the day at their house...enough time to eat with them once or twice and then head back home. It's always an all day affair but so enjoyable!

Aaron's Photos

One of the things Aaron does here is write and take pictures for Ethno Traveler online magazine. You can find his most recent pictures published here. His talents never cease to amaze me. Aaron is one of those people who can literally pick up anything and learn it. It may take time, but he always excels in it. So proud of you, Aaron!

Enjoy his pictures!